Nidhis.daily.blog

Tag: breakup

  • Perpetual Debt

    I owe you. Unfailingly. Copious quantities of apologies. Prayers unlimited. A lifetime of asking forgiveness. A confession every living breath.

    I owe you. Unfailingly. Reasoning fails. Actions don’t make sense. Numbers don’t add up. Words don’t resonate. Scripts sound vague. Behaviours seem irrational. Logic seems hollow.

    I owe you. Unfailingly. A soliloquy replays. A monologue re-enacted. A social credit unreturned. A willingness to return the kindness, the gratitude and to give back infinitely.

    I owe you. Unfailingly. Time. Distance. Solitude. Peace. Quiet. Calm. Fulfillment. Health. Love. Togetherness. Bliss. Amen.

  • The last dance

    The night was young, so were the two of them. As young adults who had just started earning and tasted the success of freedom, they were both convinced this was the best thing to do. Freedom from parental curfews, freedom from education goals and lastly freedom from each other – from the unsaid commitments made half a decade ago.

    So they were dessed to the nines for a night of celebration. Closest of friends were invited, a great weekend was planned ahead. They hopped onto the bike and reached the local watering hole for the party to begin. The club was a popular one, dark yet mystic with loud thumping music blaring the mix of all songs from the disco 80’s to the fast paced one’s of the early 2000’s.

    They weren’t alone, apart from their close group of friends, they were crowds and crowds of youth grinding to the same beats. All fledgling techies, chilling and drowning themselves with the drinks, drumbeats and dance moves. But these two had eyes for each other only. Though they were hosting a ‘breakup party’, it was clear that there was much life left to live together. She swayed while he sipped. Together from dusk to dawn, they drowned the pain of parting ways with drives, dance and drinks.

  • Love or friendship?

    As I settle at my cup of coffee on this wonderful day, my mind wanders to the message I received from a long lost friend. & I wonder what if one has to choose between love and friendship. I don’t mean choosing between your lover and your friends, I mean what if you can only either be a friend or a lover to someone.

    The new generation calls it friendzoning i.e., turning a potential lover into a friend and thereby in the parking lot. And that works well for keeping a list of ‘warm leads’ or potential future partners as the youngsters want to explore more options before settling into a commitment with one.

    I wonder if there could be another use case for friendzone. Could it be used to part ways amicably and still keep friends with someone who knows you like no one else. Someone you have loved truly madly deeply.

    In short, can lovers ever be friends?

  • Burden of memories

    For all the years past, all the love lost and all the silence borne. I wish I could cry in your arms until the tears stopped flowing. I wish I could erase the memories sparing just the laughs. I wish I could ease the pain until only love remained.

    I wish I could find words to express. Courage to ask forgiveness. Strength to meet you. Intellect to rein emotions. I want to keep the memories minus the aches, the experience without the trauma and the faces without the words that were exchanged.

    In forgiveness I seek freedom. Freedom from guilt, ache, painful memories and all the sufferings related to it. For in my mind I am still the wrong doer who is out free and hence doesn’t deserve to be happy.