Empathy? Kindness? Civility? Humanity?
& all the small talk and interactions that were a social norm of the past. A hello to a stranger. A greeting to a neighbour. An exchange of pleasantries with the staff.
Let’s bring them all back, few words at a time and fill warmth and love back into this digitally hooked world!
Beauty has become skin deep – literally. From injectables, fillers and intravenous infusion of essential ‘skin nutrients’ the beauty business has been booming thanks to ever-increasing standards of beauty and the omnipresent desire to be youthful forever. While it’s an essential for folks in the business of beauty, more and more regular folks are also opting for their dose of vitamins. Either as a means of self love or to stay presentable in their domain of work (read CXO etc). Afterall social media has hyped splurging on oneself as the equivalent of self love – if you can, why should you not!
So here’s the myth-bursting for poor you who is doing resistance training thrice a week & 150 minutes of cardio, getting the prescribed dose of beauty sleep and eating clean. Yet you are left wondering why your signs of aging aren’t in reverse as those insta-worthy snaps of the modern day celebrities!
Isn’t that a lingering thought on most of your decisions from the past? Had I known what I ‘know today’, I would have decided differently – says the present mind.
But funnily enough we know what we know, and we don’t know what we don’t know. Hence your decision was based on the best information available at that point in time. Even if you had to make the same decision over and over again – the outcome would barely be different!
So, it’s just now, comfortably placed in your present that you can romanticize with the fantasy land of ‘What if…?’
Isn’t the purpose of education literacy and awakening of a well rounded individual?
Then why does education even in formative years have to be about scores, grades and marksheets? Is a person synonymous with these or their personality? Does emotional intelligence and well rounded knowledge also account for an individual’s identity?
Well, yes in a developed world where the goal is to thrive, and no in a developing nation where the goal is to live and make ends meet. No wonder then that the aspirational class in India faces a dichotomous world, balancing their wants with what the society chooses for them. Today’s knowledge workers occasionally pause to think is this enough, where to next? But that’s momentary, the easier, noisier and popular way is to stay part of the race.
The term has become more of a cultural notion than a physiological term. Is this societal norm even relevant in today’s era when females world over want to live more and be more than what their previous generations had access to. If one’s looking to maximize their potential both personally and professionally, then it’s time to question the status quo, dismantle any self-imposed constraints and definitely not give any headspace to conforming to conventional norms.
All of that calls for courage, bravery and a sense of street smartness to forge your own path. Awareness of aiming to be stronger than who you think you can be and constantly pushing the boundaries is what’s imperative to live life on your town terms.
Afterall a clock is to guide us in utilizing our time on this earth well, but a lock makes us a prisoner of time. So listen to your guts wisely 🙂
From living life on one’s own terms as a free bird to managing the pressures of a constrained life – every person displays bravery in their own way. Saying one is stronger than the other is a very limited and conventional view colored by societal norms. Afterall every situation requires a different set of skills, values and morals to be upheld. & every person has their unique set of hardships and struggles – they may look same on the surface, but the similarities end there.
Hence labeling, bucketing and generalizing are nothing but trivializing the matter minus the depth it deserves. We all do this on a daily basis, knowingly or sub-consciously, attaching gender, color, caste, economic status as a halo effect to the person’s being. Something as trivial as relationship status, marital status, parenthood status also becomes bias for passing judgements and clouding the personality for what they have to offer. Afterall it’s easy to pass shallow judgments but difficult to understand, empathize and appreciate the positives coming out of the negative experience.
A high intellect or IQ is directly linked to success; it is celebrated as the guarantee of victory and flashed as a sign of possessing the rare ability and access to all things good in life.
But it may come with its own perils. A higher intellect makes one more prone to analyze deeply and conclude with the left brain. It can come in the way of being soft-spoken, light-hearted and ‘go with the flow’ nature. Craving for deeper conversations, stimulating discussion and diverse views; the poor soul may always feel lonely even in a crowd. His intellect can come in the way of having a ‘good time’ chilling with a beer in a hand and talking about the mundane stuff of life. Personal relations may be at risk of being treated as less than perfect and a ‘personal project’ with room for improvement. While professional goals might be fleeting, unfulfilling or ‘way to easy’ to pose an intellectual challenge. All this said and done, there are always exceptions.
While it’s not wise to disown one’s intellect, it is always good to be cognizant of it’s weight and interference in one’s life. Afterall awareness leads to awakening. But what is awakening without action. Hoping for this path to light up your journey of working on one’s core.
‘Youngsters these days are getting influenced by the Western world’ said every generation ever. Familiar isn’t it?
But in an increasingly global village with multinational work spaces and progressive organizational structures, it is a no-brainer that one is required to be a global citizen. To be able to interact with multiple cultures, be recognized as one of them and pickup cultural nuances and references, it requires not just to study but also to ape the same. & understanding is very different from agreeing; so not mincing my words here; one needs to be able to grasp, process and acknowledge (not necessarily internalize).
However every generation in a developing nation tries to build its own future and thereby brings economic progress in the nation’s fabric by living a life of duality. Caught between the local and the global, the folk and the foreign, the day-job and post work life. They work furiously in the day adapting to western mannerisms, language and even dress up to play the part. While life after the day’s job is over is spent in comfort food, dressing and soaking up content in the local dialect. Thus the commuter culture which shifts gears effortlessly from what they grew up as kids and what the adult life has shaped them to consume. Those who adapt prevail better than those who don’t. So the next time a youngster brings a ‘western Point of view’ at work or otherwise, remember we all have been there done that!
Group dynamics are interesting social settings to ponder over. & here are my observations from the past decade of friendships.
A two-person setup keeps it tight, personal and sometimes even deep. Deep gossip or deep intellectual – it can swing from either extreme. Yet it’s an unsigned deal between the two folks to keep the conversation to themselves as these are shared in privacy as both confide in each other.
Make it three individuals and the setting becomes a bit more less intimate, more formal and way more lighter. Of course it can get weird with one feeling left out while the other two bond and the dynamics get a bit odd (literally and figuratively as well). After all, the odd (wo) man out has no option but to listen in and try to fit in!
But add another person and cross-talks are an option now! Nobody feels left out as you can pick up another conversation with the fourth guy. Now it’s all fun and laughter, good humored banter sprinkled with bitching and whining where all join in with their experiences. No room for sad or serious topics here mind you as all are full of jest.
Whatever your cup of tea; tango or tri-party or full-blown party; keep sipping as much and as often from all the flavors of life. After all YOLO 😉
A couple being by themselves once the children move out is commonly termed Empty Nest. & this usually happens once the children are 20 years or older and have moved out for college or career. But these days younger parents could be facing a half-empty nest with kids even as young as 10 years.
As the child approaches middle school and starts building a network of friendship and hobbies, she is away from home for more than half the day. Moreover she has started making her own decisions for trivial matters of clothing, feeding and the like so interactions with parents are limited in this sense too.
For material things like food, money and complex social situations, she may still need you; the parent; and your role as a provider gets fulfilled therein. But you may start missing the hugs and kisses, the series of ‘why questions’ & the silly jokes, pillow fights as there is no room for it!
Staying in the moment and cherishing time with your child is the best parenting experience one can provide. Afterall this mid-life half-empty next would only make the parent stronger for what comes a decade later – a fully empty nest ☹
Nidhis.daily.blog 