“You are the love of my life”, said Eve when her eyes first met Adam’s. Love bloomed and the rest is history. Had they gotten married or co-lived, that’s when ‘its complicated’. Especially when the Eve wants the Adam to be as evolved, in tune with what’s in and become the man of her dreams. Not to forget she felt she had met the man of her dreams but then familiarity breeds contempt, doesn’t it?
Give it time. Let it be organic. Add some space sprinkle some humour and throw in some talks. While socialization is immediate and wider in reach, making friendships last is precise yet organic.
It requires overlooking that random comment, a weird conversation once in a while and some abrupt time-outs. Learning to let go yet tredding difficult conversations – it is a tightwalk indeed. Yet rewarding as you find your humans, your tribe. One friend at a time.
But to stay is tough. To endure is courageous. To remain committed is brave.
Because there is no newness, there is little room for surprise and there isn’t an element of thrill that might be unexplored. Unlike the early days where everything is rosy, real life is a riot of all hues. Some vivid, others sombre and a few downright nasty.
Best to keep your rosy glasses on for optimal experience – as they say happiness is me!
In today’s era, we often rush to draw conclusions, haste to put labels and are quick (sometimes lightning quick) to make go/no go decisions.
What if we made more room for errors, laughed on the silly bits and listened without judgements. Accepting the imperfections of people around us and unfocusing on the fixes we wish for them.
Unbridled, this is when we start bonding without expectations and yet keep the elbow room for erring. I am, if I start separating the dude from the deed, indeed.
Did you know humans are only 54% accurate at detecting lies? That means on a given day, you may only half guess what’s being told to be true and believe it too.
Now there is blatant lies and subtle lies. Half the media you consume is subtle lies cos it’s untrue but yet can’t be proven to be false largely. It is the author’s interpretation of a situation given her biases, limitations and emotions.
Blatant lies is the easier variant – both to pull off and to guess. Because it either is a masterpiece or a shabby work of art. It’s like giving everyone a version of the story what they would like to hear. Where nothing is false but nothing is true either.
Sounds like an oxymoron? Not really. Growth that comes by being together can be complemented by growing independent as well.
Think of your dependents like kids or elderly parents. Isn’t all your endeavor towards making them independent thereby driving their growth. At the same time, sharing space and resources imparts growth which is difficult to achieve by being aloof.
Likewise couples – friends, dating or otherwise too can find organic growth by sharing bonds of togetherness as well as by asserting bouts of independence. Such a journey is both natural and cyclical – not to pit one against the other.
Life is a string of moments. Moments where the eyes meet, words are exchanged and thoughts are shared with others. Moments when two persons connect and their souls share a lyrical beat.
In such moments; mostly fleeting and sometimes lasting, we realize what the heart misses the most. Whom it cherishes and what it desires. These are the moments when an hour spent could seem like eternity.
The grass is always green on the other side. Empty nesters crave company, full nesters crave solitude. Parents seek silence, couples seek space and singles seek intimacy.
If only we could start stirring a dollop of joy in what we do and chime in a jingle apt for what we are facing. If only we could start fully embracing the cards we are dealt on a daily basis. ‘I am happy, I am blessed’ is a human rarity.
Pure, unadulterated and unhinged – the first love you find as budding young adult at college. Described here is the recollection of college sweethearts.
For us it was simply joyful to wait for each other, the bus and our college sessions. We used to look forward to turning up each day, knowing we can then bask in each other’s being. Simple joys of being seated next to each other. In a bus full of people yet the world was just you and me for those twenty minutes. The ride would be just us both cherishing the quiet after the long, noisy and chaotic college day. Quiet in which we found each other and our love; of which we grew fond, of which we wove dreams of a happily ever after and of which we exchanged unsaid vows of trust and friendship.
Can one be far from the other? A snake can be nurtured to not bite, but shall it never return to it’s true nature which is to bite?
Yes it would, when pushed to a wall, when threatened and when the fight or fright response kicks in. But humans have trained even their flight or fight response, like a double edged sword. Centuries of conditional upbringing and societal orthodoxes impact our responses sub-conciously. Unawares, we tend to utilize our nurturings more often than the nature and often nurture becomes too comfortable to be our nature altogether.
This explains the late awakenings of many beings. Who in the journey of self-discovery wonder why didn’t the obvious response come to them by nature? The answer lies in what they were nurtured to believe in.
Nidhis.daily.blog 