Nidhis.daily.blog

Category: Relationship

  • The subtle art of making (& keeping) friendships

    Is it even an art? Did making friends not come naturally to us as kids? When did friendship become (almost) as complicated as dating?

    In today’s hyperconnected world with shrinking attention spans, making connections that last has truly become a task. And we are talking about adult friendships here when you can’t spend evenings after evenings at the local bar, weekends at the fav discotheque cos you have a family to get back to (maybe even a kid or two looking for your attention). It gets even harder isn’t it, trying to spend time is more strategic than a game of chess in that phase of life!

    Table for two

    So be the Wing (wo)man when you can – thankfully  even IMs, chats and ‘liking’  SM posts are considered legit form of communication these days. So bless you, don’t have to be the 3am agony aunt but just hang around when your schedule allows you to.

    & then there are those friends who like to get challenged. They engage with you to get a different PoV, so go ahead and get your intellectual fill as well!

    And the last kinds just want you to be a good listener,an empathiser they can count on, someone who is their safe space.

    So find your frequency, pick the phone and dial/chat up with that friend. Maybe they too have been meaning to reach out but have been lost adulting.  🫰

  • Why gamification matters

    It matters as not everyone likes to work hard. Not everyone likes to slog themselves for long hours. Not everyone loves the idea of being a disciplined, routine driven person.

    Learning via Games

    Bringing in gamification breaks the monotony of the daily timetable, allows flexibility with fun, lets break free from them vs us and brings people to do things together. It helps build a team, at work, at home, as a family, as a couple too.

    Gamification allows you to stay in the moment, be focused and try to learn. It ensures that you may still enjoy the process as much as the outcome. Try to use it in your next task and let the fun begin!

  • The art of staying forever

    Who doesn’t want to be remembered forever? Who wouldn’t like that his/her interactions be the fondest memory of as many people as could be? In short how you make people feel would make you last for an eternity, in their memories, as part of their lives.

    Fill others with kindness, warmth and compassion. Fill yourself with moments to decompress from daily stressors. Stay light hearted. Be in love; with a purpose, with yourself.

    Eating wisely, eat clean and listen to your body. It’s the best inner compass for your health and morality. Stay nimble and keep moving.

    Belong; find your tribe, your community. A healthy social circle which keeps you going and which you keep going to. Invest time in family by creating rituals which create lasting bonds.

  • Complementary Better Half

    Most people would like to settle for a life partner who is exactly like them. Like a siamese twin! But think of it if both partners think alike a 100%, there would be no diversity of thoughts and inclusivity of opinions. In short no room for growth 🤔

    Flourish don’t flounder

    How about someone who complements you? Not like showering praises but supplements your persona. They cover those bases that you don’t, their strength lies in areas where you struggle and they view life a little differently than you!

    Yes there would be friction, debates and different points of view; but then isn’t growth a tad bit uncomfortable. 😇

  • Bravery : Boon or Bane?

    Brave are those who open their hearts at a tender age,

    Brave are those who stand by the choices they made.

    Brave are those who know they are in the wrong,

    Brave are those who know where they don’t belong.

    Brave are those who hold a flag to reach out,

    Brave are those who jump on without a doubt.

    Brave are those who don’t shy from the tough talks,

    Brave are those who match your stead on these rough walks.

    Brave are those who wish you well, silently,

    Brave are those who manifest your blessings, vehemently.

  • Intentional Living

    Is that the opposite of mindful living? Where one stops to smell the roses and stays aware of the here and now.

    Or is being intentional a complementary way of being aware of the deeper meaning of what you do. Trying to attach purpose to what one does and how one does it. Be it planning a family day out or a day date with your partner. To give your actions an objective, is like giving a soul to the sculpture. It’s like giving personality to the creative. 

    And it doesn’t have to be an overthinking exercise, just one word out of a few options. Why do you wanna buy that thing in your cart – is it serving a long desired purpose or another way to deal with a failure? Why are you reaching out for that piece of cookie – did you earn it for your cheat day or just to deal with your emotions?

    Try being intentional everyday and soon you’ll be flexing this muscle even in nurturing your relationships. And that could be such a game changer to turn talks into conversations and turn dates into connections. After all to live without intent is to just survive!

  • Wonder wall

    They said something gross, you got angry. They didn’t speak up, you got angry  They did something, you got angry. They did nothing, you got angry. There’s a pattern you see, it seems it isn’t them but you after all.

    Whether they do or don’t, say or not, you expect more and you get attached to the outcome. You center it upon yourself and equate it to your worth. And that my friend makes you angry.

    The action, the words, the behaviour is there’s to decide. Your reaction to it is solely your realm. Preserve it, guard your happiness, maintain your equilibrium and protect your inner peace. Shamelessly. Because only you can shelter it, nurture it and derive strength from it.

    Don’t wait for a prince or princess charming to rescue you, be your own protector. Be your wonder wall.

  • Chemistry or Compatibility : Why did you marry your spouse?

    You fell head over heels for someone, cupid struck you with love at first sight? Or did you follow a dating algorithm and sieve through a list of potential suitors?

    If the former, it is likely that underlying chemistry played a bigger role in turning the courtship into lifelong commitment. After all, love is a game played by the hearts and not the minds ☺️

    If the later, it is likely that underlying compatibility played a larger part in formalizing the courtship. You may have consciously (or on a subconscious) level analysed how they fit into your life goals – personal and professional.

    Either way, your work towards your marriage is cut out ‘cos both these ingredients are rightfully required for a successful partnership. If your chemistry is awesome, work on being more compatible and the other way around holds true too. After all, we may fall in love with our soul but to stay in love needs both mind as well as soul.

  • Post marital depression – new label to an age old phenomena

    Move aside Post partum depression (which is prevalent only in new mothers), post martial depression is for real too. As the honeymoon period (first few years post wedding) draws to an end, the cuteness of ‘opposites attract’ gets replaced by ‘petty squabbles’. Merging individual lifestyles, cultures and langages is bound to create frictions of low intensity.

    Plus a big alteration is to your life balance which was neatly organized around work on weekdays and chores over weekend (& sometimes never cos your mom/sister/grandma did it for you). Now each day is hybrid & requires attention to many more things about managing a household.

    The fun of getting to know a complete new set of parents, cousins, aunts, uncles is vanishing. Now it’s more of sustaining these adopted relationships. Moreover becoming a parent adds to the chaos; demanding  superlative physical and mental strength.

    So to mitigate this seven year itch, start strengthening your communication and practice active listening with the spouse. Trying to spend time together minus the variables (read kids and parents) helps reconnect. Add humour to your ‘us time’ so that you both can laugh off some of the dust that has dimmed the bonds of love. After all, you ‘2’ come before we ‘3/4/5’, whatever the number be!

  • I’ll be there for you ☺️

    There are friends who laugh with you, build good times and lasting memories. & then there are friends who sense the urgency and seriousness in your tone even on a text.

    Whatever the day, time or situation at their own end, they stick it out for you. Being the listener to your woes, the agony aunt to your crying and the empathetic ear to all your rantings. But then they also snap you out of your self propagated miseries, throw a line to pull you out of your self victimization and offer contrary views to probe your mind to think differently.

    That’s your best buddy, your 3 am friend, your safe space. Cheers to them & cheers to you for having them!